Thursday, July 12, 2012

Ooh, The Nerve of That Tyler Clancy!

I'm so mad I could karate kick that Tyler Clancy in the face!

Hi swim fans!  Your favorite Phelps Phan, Ritchie MP Cummins here!  I just had to get on here and say that I just can't take it any more!  Why is everybody dogging on my main man Michael Phelps!?  

Michael did awesome at the Olympic try-outs.  Of course we all knew he would make the team, and it's no big deal that he got beat by Ryan Locktey in the 400 IM.  We could all tell that he wasn't even trying at the end because he was saving his energy for the Olympics.  Like they say about the try-outs:  If you are first and second you are first and everybody else did a good try too!  That's because two people make the Olympic team in every event.  They used to let every country have three swimmers in every event but then there was a guy named Mark Spitz who was really fast and they said it was unfair. Mark Spitz had an awesome mustache because he wanted to be like Michael Phelps too!  

...except Mark Spitz forgot to shave it off at the Olympics!  Who shaves their legs but then forget to shave the stachio?
It sounds like Tyler Clancy, the guy who got third place in the 400 IM, is really jealous because Michael wins all the time.  It just ticks me off.  He went on the internet and said a whole bunch of stuff about Michael and basically called him a lazy slacker!  What's up with that?  It doesn't make any sense.  Everybody knows Michael is the hardest worker ever.  Coach Boman even makes him practice on Christmas day!  

Mr. Clancy, you need to get your facts straight and just get over it.  You guys are both on the same team now and you are not being a very good teammate!  Ya know, I wish I could buy tickets to watch you guys when you practice your laps together before the Olympics.  I bet Michael will kick your butt every time and he could probably do it without even using his arms!